Phendrana Drifts

On the drive home from a business trip my colleagues and I were discussing movies. I love how that sentence makes it sound like I’m all grown up. And on that topic of being grown up we got to the topic of whether it can be socially acceptable for grown men to cry at movies. I was willing to test the waters right away and declare that yep, I cry during some films. And the mockery that ensued suggests that that social norms don’t yet welcome it.

Not that I don’t like the mockery – I welcome it. I’m sufficiently comfortable in my own skin to admit what I admitted, as well I am sufficiently comfortable to mock those whose list is even longer than this. I declared to the car there were 10 movies I cry during, and I said it in a way that made it sound like I confidently counted when in fact developing this list I found it wasn’t as easy as I thought. Not all 10 cause guaranteed tears, but all have resulted in my own personal Niagara Falls upon initial viewing, if not over multiple screenings.

Armageddon
The one that was first mentioned in the car, and the one that results in Duncan tears almost every time at the very end.

YouTube Clip at the very end of the film

The Iron Giant
I passionately believe that this is one of, if not the most underrated movies of all time. I love it and could not possibly recommend it enough. Sadly, few people have seen it, and if you are one of them make an point to catch it the next time you rent a movie or are on iTunes.

YouTube trailer

The Fellowship of the Ring
I believe this is my favourite of the three Lord of the Rings films, although really I tend to judge them as a single really long movie. The climax in particular is quite touching, and sets up a great adventure in the second and third acts.

The Return of the King
Bookending the climax of the first film is the climax of the third film. Now including both these films was difficult because while I certainly know I had man tears in theatres for both, I do not continue to cry today when I watch. But don’t let that take away from the fact that I think the ending is both emotional and fitting.

The Patriot
I don’t especially like this Mel Gibson film about the American Revolution and there isn’t much that is special about it, even with the presence of a young Heath Ledger, but there is a scene with Gibson’s character and his daughter that really gets me everytime. It is unlikely many will see the film if they haven’t already, so I’ll spoil away – the daughter stopped speaking before the film starts after her mom passed, and as Gibson’s character leaves to go to war again she breaks out in tears and begs him not to go. Sniff.

YouTube clip – go to 1:35 to see the scene I’m talking about

Braveheart
A much better Gibson film, and one where there are multiple tugs on my tear ducts. I would also imagine given the nature of the film, an appropriate example of when it is ok for men to cry in a film.

The Shawshank Redemption
As a now popular film on video, then on cable television I imagine almost all of you readers have seen it, but if you haven’t go get it. The very, very end gets me briefly each viewing, but far more accurate to say I choke up rather than let go completely.

Big Fish
If you are a man who has a Dad and loves him at all, it is hard to watch and not feel something at the climax. Toronto Mike has a great rundown on why it makes guys cry, so I won’t rehash it, rather just link.

Toronto Mike

Schindler’s List
As I am not made of stone, it wasn’t until the third or fourth viewing that this film didn’t cause me to reach for the kleenex. I also have decided this movie, one of my favourites, is a standard bearer for two other World War II films that cause me to come close to tears – the Pianist and Saving Private Ryan. All three are worth checking out.

Passion of the Christ
I wonder if it is Mel Gibson who is the common link here… in any case, the scene where Jesus falls while carrying the cross and Mary comes to help him up chokes me up – it is a well-crafted moment in what otherwise is a difficult and almost disturbing movie to watch. If you haven’t seen it, I would suggest Martin Scorsese’s The Last Temptation of Christ over this film, which is a much more intelligent and thought-provoking (not to mention enjoyable) version of Christ’s last days prior to crucifixion.